Today I finished my tenure at Decatur Middle School, where I taught general music for nine years. I love my job! I love the relationships that have been developed with the staff. Over this period of time I have also come to realize that I love middle school students too.

What does one accumulate in nine years? A bunch of junk! However, I’m good!!! I fit it all into 7 boxes. I get home, rather proud of my 7 boxes, and tell my wife. What was her response? “So where do we put seven boxes?” Go figure, I just can’t win.

What do I do next? Honestly, I don’t know.

Fortunately, I do have a job at an elementary school but I’m not sure if I have the same passion for that age group. I anticipate trying to find another job as either a music teacher or working with a church in youth or music ministry.

Please pray for me in this time of transition.

Why is this happening?

That’s where we left it with part 1 of the post. On to part 2…

Our culture has changed and many of our methods have not. We have to take responsibility as educators and youth workers for what we need to do differently and what we need to do better. We have to take responsibility for becoming better teachers and better students.

In what areas have we become stagnant?

In what areas have we always done it that way?

In what ways are we allowing current culture to distract us from what is best for our audience?

In our changing culture everyone seems to be busier. One of the most damaging effects of busyness that I’ve seen is in the parent involvement. At such a crucial time we are seeing less and less positive modeling for our youth. Maybe some of the parents don’t know any better. Maybe some of them don’t care. Maybe some of them are doing the best they can. Maybe some of them don’t think it’s their job. Isn’t that why they pay teachers and clergy?

I am a strong advocate for families being the primary influence in the lives of their children. With that being said, when you take into account the scrutiny that schools and churches are coming under, how do you respond? It’s my belief that schools and churches will increasingly have to take on the burden and responsibility of “parenting” if we are to achieve the goals we desire. I realize this is a dangerous statement. Because it is such a dangerous statement let me reiterate – I do not think it is the responsibility of churches and schools. However, something must be done to make up the ground that is being given away.

“How do you motivate the unmotivated?” I don’t know where this comes from originally, but it is something I hear frequently at school. And that question also isolates the core issue we deal with in youth ministry.

How do we equip, inspire, or motivate students to live the truth? Admittedly, this presupposes that we are actually teaching the Truth in a way that is meaningful to our youth. My personal opinion is that we’ve done a great job with “meaningful” but we have a ways to go with “Truth.”

But anyway…

Can one “make” youth have the right heart attitude?

Can one “make” youth live out the truth they know?

Can one “make” youth care enough about church to make it a priority?

What can I do? I can only be responsible for them to the extent allowed by God. It sounds a lot like parenting, doesn’t it? It breaks my heart that I have to see them struggle to make it their own (or not).

Pray for our youth and their families like life and death depended on it – it does.

Create opportunities for meaningful relationships. Treat it like it’s important – it is.

Teach the Bible like as the ultimate source of authority – there is no other way.

Be at peace and trust that God knows what He’s doing – He does.

There has been a lot of talk in different places lately about the idea that youth ministry isn’t working as well as it should anymore. For the most part, this idea has been promoted because so many youth are leaving the church when they leave high school.

Some people suggest that people are leaving the church because of a lack of relationship within the church.

I just plain don’t care.

And no one really knows the answer…

Is it that way with adults and what some people mockingly call “big church?” Is anyone looking to see if there is any correlating information about adults coming and going out of churches? Are they asking the same questions and making the same comments?

Let’s take it a step further. For some time the public schools have struggled with rising expectations and trying to equip students to meet those standards. Ask people why the schools are failing and you are likely to see a list of things similar to the list above. This has become such a major issue that the government has started to step in, replace teachers, and close down schools. Admittedly, there are a lot of arguable issues here such as funding, how scores are created, how students are measured, and “No Child Left Behind,” to name a few. In theory, however, these are all issues related to helping the students.

Few of these things seem to be working. Why?

Why is this happening?

To be continued…

I’ve been teaching and working with youth for almost 10 years now and there is a comment that almost never fails to take me by surprise.

What is the comment? It goes something like this…

“I’ll show them respect when they show me respect!”

I’m always taken a little off guard by that comment even though it is one that I’ve been taught since my university days. Back in my early education as a teacher we were taught to earn the respect of our students. We were told that they would respect us if we respected them. This has led to a not-so-subtle influence that has crept in that says if you show me respect then I will reciprocate.

As I consider God’s Word I struggle with this philosophy. Take these following passages as examples.

“Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right (Ephesians 6:1, ESV).”

“Let every person be subject to the governing authorities. For there is no authority except from God, and those that exist have been instituted by God (Romans 13:1, ESV).”

If I consider these words and take them seriously, I see that respect is something I show because of God’s authority in my life and the fact that God has placed other people in authority over me. It doesn’t seem to have a whole lot to do with whether or not I “feel” respected.

Don’t get me wrong, being disrespected is certainly wrong and usually does cause a lot of frustration and even anger. In fact, anger is what I’m going to address in my next Pet Peeves post. It does not, however, give any reason to respond back with a lack of respect towards that person in authority.

It may seem a little stern to have an approach like this but I also see it as being biblical. The principles found in Ephesians and Romans are the same principles that I try to instill in my students and in my young daughter.

These are also principles that I need to do a better job of implementing myself.

Is there anyone that you need to show more respect to? Maybe a boss or another person in authority?

Do you need to rethink your position on this and encourage others to show more respect?

Is my thinking even correct on this?

Give me your feedback! Let me know. I’d love to hear your experiences and thoughts.

1. Tennis, youth ministry, and teaching school should not be done at the same time. I absolutely love doing what I do but it is so draining! It also takes its toll on me and my family.

2. Certain kinds of plastics leach harmful chemicals. I guess I knew that but I haven’t started paying attention to that until recently.

3. Chlorine and flouride could also be dangerous to the body.

Disclaimer: there is a lot of information and “research” out there and I am not a scientist. I do not attest to the accuracy of these claims. It has given me something to think about though.

4. The Sermon on the Mount passage in Matthew 5-7 is an amazing passage! We started studying it this summer with our youth group (3-D) and it is powerful. At the heart is the “heart.”

5. Impatience shows a lack of humility. This one has been really difficult for me to learn. It first got my attention as I was listening to a message by C.J. Mahaney. Here is the main idea – I get impatient when things don’t go my way. Selfishness is when I want things my way. Impatience, therefore, is a form of selfishness. When I am being selfish I do not have a proper view of myself. When I have an improper view of myself I do not look at God properly either. In the end it shows that I lack humility and need to re-orient my focus back towards God. “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble (James 4:6).”

6. Life is short. A friend of ours, approximately the same age, is going through the final stages of cancer. It makes you reconsider a lot of things.

7. My thinking goes all over the place and that’s okay!